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 | When I was growing up, and even into my 20s, I thought that people who cheated were like bad apples, spoiling the monogamous apple cart of love where every one got along in crisp deliciousness. Then I started listening to people. When I became a good listener - which meant being trustworthy, willing, and able to hold stories that weren't meant for sharing - I learned that way more people than I imagined struggle with monogamy. What that looks like isn't always the image you have of cheating, but neither is it a few bad apples amongst bushels of good ones. I was just about to write "we're all apples" which tells me that this metaphor has run its course. But the topic hasn't. This week four articles on fooling around in ways you didn't expect. ~ Cory |
| What's the Difference Between Infidelity, Adultery, and Cheating?
Understanding the various ways we have come to define sexual betrayal can give us a language to begin conversations as well as offer an insight into other people's ways of thinking through sexual activities that take place outside of a committed relationship.
| If You Cheat, Do You Tell?
How much should we weigh the outcome in our decision to confess a sexual transgression? If telling is mostly about making yourself feel better, is it the right thing to do?
| Don't Want to be a Cuckold's Wife
My husband wants me to go to a bar, start talking to a strange man, go off and have sex with him, and then come back and tell him about it. Now, I think this makes for a great fantasy BUT I am not comfortable with really doing this. It does excite me, but it really bothers me too.
| Working Through Sexual Infidelity
Romantic and/or sexual relationships can survive infidelity. Some of them thrive after a betrayal. Not because being betrayed is a turn on (it might be for a very select few masochists, but unless you know for sure that's who you're in a relationship with, I wouldn't risk it) but because the work you need to do after infidelity is precisely the kind of work we all need to do if we want to stay in long term committed relationships.
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