| Your Guide to Infidelity | | I promise you, this week's newsletter is not taking a page from scummy "cheaters" websites, manipulative TV shows, or misogynist "self-help" books about beer and hell. If infidelity involves deception then it's not something I'm going to be able to help you learn how to do, or how to do well. But it is something I think we should talk about because, like life, infidelity happens. And yet we tend to never talk of it honestly in our relationships or with our friends. As if talking about it evokes an evil spirit that will then make it so. I can promise you it doesn't work that way. Talking about infidelity doesn't make us go out and have affairs any more than talking about condoms makes teens go out and have more sex. Talking. Doing. Two different things. And until the technology develops, all I can offer is a textual kind of talking. I hope you find it interesting. ~ Cory |  | | | What's the Difference Between Infidelity, Adultery, and Cheating? | | Understanding the various ways we have come to define sexual betrayal can give us a language to begin conversations as well as offer an insight into other people's ways of thinking through sexual activities that take place outside of a committed relationship. | | | | | If You Cheat, Do You Tell? | | I first learned it from Oz (the Buffy character, not the HBO prison show); sometimes we tell ourselves that we are admitting things to our partner for their own good when it's really about making ourselves feel better. Other times, disclosing something we've done is the only right thing to do. It's always situation specific, so here are some things to consider before you tell, after you cheat. | | | | | | | Working Through Sexual Infidelity | | Romantic and/or sexual relationships can survive infidelity. Some of them actually thrive after a betrayal. Not because being betrayed is a turn on (it might be for a very select few masochists, but unless you know for sure that's who you're in a relationship with, I wouldn't risk it) but because the work you need to do after infidelity is precisely the kind of work we all need to do if we want to stay in long term committed relationships. | | | | | | | | You are receiving this newsletter because you subscribed to the About Sexuality newsletter. If you wish to unsubscribe, please click here. If you would like to unsubscribe from all newsletters sent from About.com, please send an email to optout@about.com with "Unsubscribe" as the subject line. | | 1500 Broadway, 6th Floor, New York, NY, 10036 | © 2014 About.com - All rights reserved - Privacy Policy | | | | | | | | | |
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